My Roommate the Sasquatch

I am a student of University of Ottawa, and I’m living in res. I managed to get an apartment style residence, which means that there’s 4 rooms in total, a kitchen area, two bathrooms, and a living room area.

So I have three roommates, two boys and one other girl, and I have to share a washroom with one of the boys…

In my mind I now call him Sasquatch.

I pretty much never see him… he’s hairy… and leaves mysterious signs of his presence via hairiness.

I have posted something in complaint before, HERE, on how he leaves thousands of little hairs on the floor of the shower. It’s disgusting, grosses me out, and I have to spend some time before each shower rinsing the hairs down the drain.

I have also posted a complaint HERE about how my roommates are stealing my food. This is just so you know exactly how unimpressed I am with my roommates.

But earlier this week the grossness from the shower migrated to the sink.

Cue Horrified expression

And I was horrified.

I took this picture not so shortly after I escaped from the nastyness, because I was certain the horrified look that came to my face upon discovery was still there

You know something’s bad when you feel like you have to wash your hands after you wash your hands.

Look upon it in horror!

It’s like all the grossness on the floor of the shower was brought to this smaller area, with dirt and grime and strange blue… stuff to create this concentration of nastyness that, I am pretty much ENTIRELY sure that The Sasquatch heard me complain about from his room…

He possibly even heard me rant to my Mom on the phone later that night, but if he managed to miss the startled “HOLY SHIT!” that flew from my mouth when moved from finishing my business to wash my hands…

EeeeeeEEEEEEEEwwwwwWWWWWWW-eh! Mom make it GO AWAY!

I don’t feel like a baby complaining to mom, because I am GROSSED OUT!

But I am still a bit too much of a wimp to complain directly to him… But perhaps I will print out this picture and put it on his door or something…

"Please stop leaving hair in the bathroom... everywhere. Clean up after yourself... kthxbai!"

Just… Just– EUGH!

It’s so gross! DX

Has anyone else had roommates this gross? What do you DO about it?

His cleanliness gives me the heebee jeebies…

BLEGH!

"Bow ties are cool... THAT is NOT"

It’s Just Gross. Really.

I room with two guys and one girl, and we each get our own room, and there’s a washroom for each pair of rooms in my apartment. there are two rooms and a washroom at either end of the kitchen/living room area, and yes, it is awesome.

One might think, since there are an even number of girls to guys, that the two rooms on one end of the little hall would be the guys room, and the two rooms on the other end would be the girls.

Not so.

I don’t mind sharing a wall with H, and in general even if I was sharing a washroom with J, the other girl, I still wouldn’t keep my shampoo and whatever in the washroom, because I don’t like keeping it on that stupid little shelf in the shower. Water gets in the caps and everything sucks, and soap scum builds up where they sit, and in general it’s just gross o have to use a watery, soap scum-ey shampoo/conditioner/soap/face scrub/whatever.

So I avoided that bit of grossness.

What I didn’t avoid is the tiny black hairs that H leaves in the shower, all over the floor.


They aren’t mine, I checked after my shower. I don’t leave little black hairs all over the shower floor.

I had some friends over, and there was joking, and a lot of bathroom breaks,and they eventually decided to open the frosted door that led into the shower, to, you know, check it out. One wasn’t even going to Ottawa U, and the other is in a different residence, one where there are a couple of showers per floor, not per room (she only has one roommate, and it’s one room), so it was understandable. One wanted to compare, the other wanted to get an idea of what she would be dealing with next year after her grade 13.

M, who goes to Ottawa U, laughed in a way that said that she was grossed out, and said: “You have pubes all over the floor!”

S, who doesn’t go to Ottawa U, looked over M’s shoulder for a moment, and offered: “Maybe its leg hair? He is a guy, so…”

Either way it’s gross, and I shouldn’t have to spend a few moments washing leg hair/pubes down the drain before having a shower. Hair on the floor of the shower is almost as bad as glitter on anything.

So my main question right now, other than “why me?”, is “Doesn’t he notice he’s shedding?” I feel like I wo

uld feel better if he was part cat or something, then it would be  bit more understandable.

ooh, need a shave....

It’s gross, and I don’t know how to bring this up without sounding like the crazy roommate. The best I’ve come up with is “Could you, like, clean the shower after you use it? Like,make sure everything has gone down the drain?”

I made a freaking video of it, because a picture didn’t do it justice.

I don’t know what he’s doing, perhaps he’s shaving, but shaving after/during every shower?

There’s a sink if it’s your face, and if it’s something else, do you really need to shave it?

Ugh, and the only other gross thing about res right now is how messy my room is and how we desperately need to get a bigger garbage can.

Great.

Just–Really guys, if you are sharing a shower with someone (I don’t mean at the same time), be thoughtful to what might gross them out. Be thoughtful to what might bug them.

Girls, clean hair from drains, Guys, clean up whatever you drop, and both, try to avoid having to share a shower.

Uh, 13 Doodle, We have a Code Brown in Balsam

My job this past summer was working as a Maintenance Worker at Grundy Lake.

I wasn’t the person who would direct you to your site.

I wasn’t the person who helped you change sites and sold you firewood.

I wasn’t the person who put on the nature shows, telling you about bears, and bugs, and what’s what about nature.

I didn’t guide you through any of the free trails Grundy has to offer, pointing out interesting things along the way.

I wasn’t the person who told you to quiet down from partying at midnight.

I wasn’t the person who told you you have to leave your site at 2, and do you realize it’s 2:30?

I wasn’t the person who you called to deal with your noisy neighbours, who also happened to be cutting branches from the forest for their fire.

I wasn’t any of these people, but I was the person who made sure you would want to come back.

I was the person who kept the main attraction clean.

Yes, I do mean that I made sure that branches weren’t overgrowing the roads and the sites.

Yes, I do mean that I mowed grass and trimmed the trails.

Yes, I do mean that I clipped back those prickly bushes from by the parking lots, and around your site.

But when I say that I keep the main attraction clean, I do not mean nature.

I mean the toilets.

You might say I deal with the real ‘business’ of maintaining the Park.

You may laugh, scoff at the idea that the toilets are the main attraction, but would you be so willing to go camping if the only option while camping with a little more than 100 other campers (in your AREA) was a couple of thunder boxes?

This is a hole, dug approx. 6 feet into the ground, with a box with a hole in it set on top. Bring your own toilet paper, and a flashlight if it's dark.

Grundy is known for it’s privacy ratings, but we can’t exactly make this private… every once in a while we have to go and fill in the hole, dig another one a little ways off, and put the box back on top. Putting another box, or some other kind of privacy thing around it wouldn’t work.

Yes, While the back-country sites have thunderboxes, their excuse is that they are for the people who want to go roughing it. That is for the people who want to canoe across the lake with their suff, and set up tents where they can find flat places. I think there are about 4 or 5 backcountry sites in Grundy… We don’ have to go there and clip it back, we leave that to the Rangers close to the area (Ontario Parks Rangers, a summer job for people who are turning 17 the year they sign up for it, free room and board and food, minimum wage.)

For everyone else, there are the outhouses.

We clean the outhouses.

We clean them every day.

We sweep them out, get rid of webs, wipe down the seats (with cleaning spray and a rag) to each and every set of outhouses.

There are 36 sets, I believe, in Grundy.

3 of those sets are set up as one side of one outhouse is mens, and the other is women’s.

The rest have two outhouses at each spot, which means that there are 66 individual outhouses that two Maintenance workers clean.

Every day.

 

This is what one Grundy Lake outhouse looks like. Right next to it, another would be set up, but for girls. Singles would be one of these buildings, with one gender for each door.

We also paint these when the paint starts getting cracked… I think I painted about 6 sets of outhouses this past summer. My coworkers complained about t, but I liked painting them. It used up time, and I like painting in general.

The inside looks like this... But this summer we painted the insides cream rather than green.

The toilets at Grundy actually flush as well, which was nice until I realized that it means that It can also get clogged.

Ladies flushing pads, and moms (and dads too) flush diapers… Why YES it’s the perfect size to go down that hole, now lets flush it… oh, right, that adds water and makes it expand! Oh gosh, it’s clogged!

What a surprise.

Really.

Anyway, while working, we drive around in the MNR trucks, and when we get radio calls (all students were 13 _your name_, and if you were calling someone, lets say their code name was 3-4, you would say “3-4 read 13 _your name_” and end with “13 clear”. Calls for you from this person would be “13_your name_ read 3-4” ), and one of the most common were for Code Browns.

Can you guess what it is?

Well, it’s when someone misses in a big way.

I figure that some of these people are holding themselves up while taking a dump, otherwise how did they get it all over the seat? On the floor? On the walls? (methinks this last one is some REALLY upset stomach)

I’m certain some kids think it’s funny to poop in awkward places, because I found a present behind one of the toilets once.

Yeah. my pictures look kind of unreal, and not really appropriate… also, for the majority, I haven’t had my camera, and even though I’ve been blogging for  while now, I still haven’t gotten to the point here I can see poop n the floor and splattered on the walls and think “Hey, I should get a picture of that.”

For the really bad ones we use a pressure washer (water tank in back of truck), but otherwise use a ‘bunny tail’.

This is a Bunny tail. No rabbits were harmed for the use of this.

Yeah. Bunny Tail is how I was introduced to it.

It’s gross, and there’s a lot of groaning about it, but we do it.

There are risks.

The nauseating smell, the campers who complain in he first place, the risk of a backwash of ‘shit-mist’ from the pressure-washer (hide behind door is the preferred method), along with the feeling of “Oh, nooooooo!” when the pressure washer runs out of gas and you have to leave the Scene of the Crime to get more….

But we do it.

Because we are the Maintenance workers.

We wear our coveralls with pride.

We clomp in our Steel-toed boots knowing that we’ve done a job-well-done.

While in our trucks, we still wave to campers, even knowing that there’s a certain percentage of assholes out there among you who we will have to deal with, them and their shit, and are happy when people wave back.

Yes, we wonder if the reason you smiled so widely is because you know we have to go clean up the smear you left behind, or if perhaps its because you’re happy that that Code Red (only on the female side, guess what it is) will soon be cleaned up, but we wave and smile anyway. (P.S. we are actually required to wave in the beginning, but after a week or so you get used to it and do it intentionally)

No, we are not Gate workers, we are not Naturalists, we are not Park Wardens.

We are Maintenance workers.

We clean up your shit.

I don’t think you realize quite how much you suck.

Dear Complaining Camper,

I am that person who you complained to the other day… Which one? Oh, well you know that complaint you had about there being too many holes in the beach?

Oh, you remember now?

Great.

Well, I just wanted to thank you for wasting my time, and causing me to have to explain to some other camp on the beach that no, it isn’t normally part of my job to have to shovel sand into the slight holes on the beach (read: not an actual hole, more like indentations), but have to do it because someone complained. Thank you for complaining for the beach not being flat.

Just so you know, you suck.

~Doodled93~

Dear Complaining Camper,

I’m the one who had to deal with your complaint today, when you complained about a toilet being dirty. Yes, you know the one.

Well, I went with my partner to the toilet in question, and found that it hadn’t even been used since we cleaned it. The seats were still down, and the new rolls of toilet paper hadn’t been used yet. We called to ask if it was the right toilet, Gate said yes, you had JUST complained.

We left, thinking you had seen it before it was cleaned, and were perhaps complaining about the massive amount of toilet paper someone had thrown on the floor, and had complained about it without realizing that it had been cleaned.

You complained again half an hour later, saying we hadn’t done anything about it.

You suck, I thought I’d let you know that.

~Doodled93~

Dear No-Aim,

I would like to know how you managed to get poop on all three parts of the toilet seat, and still manage to get it on the floor, one foot in front of the toilet.

As I was the one who had to clean all of it up, using a pressure washer, I feel I have a right to know just how bad your aim is, and to tell you that you suck.

You suck.

~Doodled93~

Dear Firecracker,

I don’t know if that’s what you use, or perhaps if you have a regular diet of gunpowder, but I would like to know why you are setting off firecrackers in the toilets to make there be poop splitters on the walls. Though there are no scorn marks, that is the only explanation for what I’m seeing here, and if you are not eating gunpowder or setting off firecrackers, please go see a doctor.

Also, you suck.

~Doodled93~