My Roommate the Sasquatch

I am a student of University of Ottawa, and I’m living in res. I managed to get an apartment style residence, which means that there’s 4 rooms in total, a kitchen area, two bathrooms, and a living room area.

So I have three roommates, two boys and one other girl, and I have to share a washroom with one of the boys…

In my mind I now call him Sasquatch.

I pretty much never see him… he’s hairy… and leaves mysterious signs of his presence via hairiness.

I have posted something in complaint before, HERE, on how he leaves thousands of little hairs on the floor of the shower. It’s disgusting, grosses me out, and I have to spend some time before each shower rinsing the hairs down the drain.

I have also posted a complaint HERE about how my roommates are stealing my food. This is just so you know exactly how unimpressed I am with my roommates.

But earlier this week the grossness from the shower migrated to the sink.

Cue Horrified expression

And I was horrified.

I took this picture not so shortly after I escaped from the nastyness, because I was certain the horrified look that came to my face upon discovery was still there

You know something’s bad when you feel like you have to wash your hands after you wash your hands.

Look upon it in horror!

It’s like all the grossness on the floor of the shower was brought to this smaller area, with dirt and grime and strange blue… stuff to create this concentration of nastyness that, I am pretty much ENTIRELY sure that The Sasquatch heard me complain about from his room…

He possibly even heard me rant to my Mom on the phone later that night, but if he managed to miss the startled “HOLY SHIT!” that flew from my mouth when moved from finishing my business to wash my hands…

EeeeeeEEEEEEEEwwwwwWWWWWWW-eh! Mom make it GO AWAY!

I don’t feel like a baby complaining to mom, because I am GROSSED OUT!

But I am still a bit too much of a wimp to complain directly to him… But perhaps I will print out this picture and put it on his door or something…

"Please stop leaving hair in the bathroom... everywhere. Clean up after yourself... kthxbai!"

Just… Just– EUGH!

It’s so gross! DX

Has anyone else had roommates this gross? What do you DO about it?

His cleanliness gives me the heebee jeebies…

BLEGH!

"Bow ties are cool... THAT is NOT"

I don’t think you realize quite how much you suck.

Dear Complaining Camper,

I am that person who you complained to the other day… Which one? Oh, well you know that complaint you had about there being too many holes in the beach?

Oh, you remember now?

Great.

Well, I just wanted to thank you for wasting my time, and causing me to have to explain to some other camp on the beach that no, it isn’t normally part of my job to have to shovel sand into the slight holes on the beach (read: not an actual hole, more like indentations), but have to do it because someone complained. Thank you for complaining for the beach not being flat.

Just so you know, you suck.

~Doodled93~

Dear Complaining Camper,

I’m the one who had to deal with your complaint today, when you complained about a toilet being dirty. Yes, you know the one.

Well, I went with my partner to the toilet in question, and found that it hadn’t even been used since we cleaned it. The seats were still down, and the new rolls of toilet paper hadn’t been used yet. We called to ask if it was the right toilet, Gate said yes, you had JUST complained.

We left, thinking you had seen it before it was cleaned, and were perhaps complaining about the massive amount of toilet paper someone had thrown on the floor, and had complained about it without realizing that it had been cleaned.

You complained again half an hour later, saying we hadn’t done anything about it.

You suck, I thought I’d let you know that.

~Doodled93~

Dear No-Aim,

I would like to know how you managed to get poop on all three parts of the toilet seat, and still manage to get it on the floor, one foot in front of the toilet.

As I was the one who had to clean all of it up, using a pressure washer, I feel I have a right to know just how bad your aim is, and to tell you that you suck.

You suck.

~Doodled93~

Dear Firecracker,

I don’t know if that’s what you use, or perhaps if you have a regular diet of gunpowder, but I would like to know why you are setting off firecrackers in the toilets to make there be poop splitters on the walls. Though there are no scorn marks, that is the only explanation for what I’m seeing here, and if you are not eating gunpowder or setting off firecrackers, please go see a doctor.

Also, you suck.

~Doodled93~