Dinosaurs are Sexy

(Apparently…)

So Recently I’ve gotten a huge YouTube cush on DanIsNotOnFire and AmazingPhil, and one of the videos they’ve done together is this one:

And the sequel HERE

So, since I’m in Halifax with a friend, we decided to go onto a dating app (a free one, obviously) as this dinosaur:

Dina_Rawr is, unsurprisingly, a dinosaur...

Dina_Rawr is, unsurprisingly, a dinosaur…

Sexy, I know…

Everyone else on Plenty Of Fish agree.

It’s kind of weird.

Siobhan and I had fun with the profile, our alternate identity of Dina_Rawr.

to give you an idea of what we were like as Dina, here’s the ‘about me’ that we wrote up:

I feel taller than I am (If you know what I mean), and sometimes feel displaced in time.
I’m an herbivore but am willing to have a little meat every once in a while ๐Ÿ˜‰
I love it when a guy has a sense of humour, especially if he can spot a subtler joke and roll with it.
I also love it when a guy has a *firm* knowledge of dinosaurs.
(we were prepared to roll with the people confused :D)
We were athletic, we were sexy, we were young (decided to stick to born in 1993 since they didn’t have anything close to the Jurassic Era…), and we were astonishingly popular!
Seriously, for ‘Profession’ we put “Being a Dinosaur” and guys were like “Oh my GOD it’s a FUCKING DINOSAUR!” and a little strange part of their brains went “Gee, I would love to fuck a dinosaur…”
And some of them went about it by trying to be as sexy as possible via text (many times reusing jokes we made up for the profile), some decided to forgo all that nonsense and sent a request to meet up (because who has the time for conversation when there’s a dinosaur on the internet?), or else a classy “Hey, wanna chat?” along with a picture of their penis…
(My god there were so many O_O)
And some… well, the decided to use, ย you know, actual conversation.
This usually went well (unless it degenerated into surprise penis pics), and one guy was so awesome I wish I could find his profile, he was just about horrifyingly witty ๐Ÿ˜€
If he ever finds this blog, (you said you were also interested in being friends, had your skype address in your profile, and said you didn’t know much about archaeology and gave an a-d list of things you knew… you’re awesome by the way…)
Of course there were people who thought we were just playing, and asked for “A picture with a little less scales”, so we sent this:
"LOL a pic of me and my old bf :)"

“LOL a pic of me and my old bf ๐Ÿ™‚ He was a bit unBEARable at times…”

Or, if they asked for body pics, we sent this:
"How's this? Me in bed ;)"

“How’s this? Me in bed ;)”

It was kind of amazing.
Some people didn’t have a sense of humour, and some played along pretty well ๐Ÿ™‚
But seriously, it’s crazy how many people were (and actually are still) messaging us… at most, we had 83 messages happening by this morning. Right now, there are 74 messages pending.
Seriously, I hadn’t thought people would be so attracted to dinosaurs…
BONUS: An example on the kind of humour that was being displayed…
One guy said I should go into hiding because there were some meteorites happening in Russia, and I thought that was pretty clever. I mean, current events??? What?
So I said “Oh, you shouldn’t worry about me… I’ve only just come out of my hipster phase. That’s probably why you haven’t heard of me, I was underground.”
I seriously suggest you try it, it’s super fun ๐Ÿ™‚

Word Exchanges– Why not use Grumpy instead?

So, in general, if I find a word, or group of words, that can convey the same message as something a little more crass, I’ll use it.

It usually works for me, it’s usually understandable, and it means I have these words, or this word, to fall back on to be a bit more diplomatic.

Or, you know, can say this in front of children and the elderly without the brain-pinching panic of No-Wait-I-Take-It-Back!

Lately I’ve found myself even thinking these words, but I’ve found that some don’t translate… quite the same way.

And sorry, but this explanation is going to require these word replacements as well as the replacement-ee’s.

The word that seems to be getting lost in the exchange is my usage of ‘Grumpy’

Not THIS Grumpy, no. More like the emotion/attitude that is his namesake.

Usually I’m using this to tell people that yeah, in general, you seem a bit defensive, or sharp, or mean lately.

This does seem a bit juvenile, yes. It seems like the kind of thing that you would even ask a 5-year-old (or mockingly ask an adult) if they were being grumpy.

Perhaps even being a Grumpy Pants.

But add-ons to this have a variety of translations in my mind.

->”You’ve been a bit grumpy lately…”

Translates into

“Go take a nap or something… relax.”

->”Stop being so grumpy.”

Translates into

“You’re being mean. Stop ย it.”

->”You’re really grumpy lately.”

Translates into

“You’re snapping at people like a wounded bear.”

->”Why are you so grumpy all the time?”

Translates into

“Stop coming after anything I say like a wounded bear with a chainsaw and a misdirected grudge!!”

->”You’re being really, really Grumpy right now”

Translates into

“You’re being a bitch. STOP IT.”

->”Someone’s grumpy then…”

Translates intoย 

“Youย are being so mean right now you’re making me angry, don’t bug me right now”

->”Well I guess we all know who’s the grumpy one right now…”

ย Translates intoย 

“You are being horrible, leave me alone so I can seethe, or I’ll bite you in the FACE! Like a SHARK!”

And usually it goes on from there, until it gets back into some swearing, varying in intensity while sounding vaguely the same, like:

“Well that was bitchy…”

Whichย Equals

“Why would you say that you horrible person! That was hurtful!”

to

“You’re being a bitch right now. A huge one.”

Which Equals

“I AM A WOUNDED BEAR WITH TWO CHAINSAWS AND A SHARK WHO WILL BITE YOUR HEAD OFF! Stop poking me with a stick dipped in acid and burning with the flames of your bad day/week.”

(a rough translation)

The shark is behind you, waiting for my signal.

So yeah, grumpy sounds preschool, but it’s unusual enough in conversation that it usually makes people stop and reevaluate the conversation thus far, and sometimes other conversations they’d had that day.

It also results in come-backs like “What are you, a child?”, said with such scorn it could peel upholstery from furniture and varnish from wood.

Other such grumpy responses are also the norm, but, after that, reflection usually happens, and I find that people can’t NOT feel like maybe they should think things over after they spew their vitriol at someone who uses words like ‘Grumpy’.

So really, I think it works, even if people sometimes don’t understand that I’m not being childish OR patronizing when I say they’re being grumpy.

Because really, we’re all a little Grumpy every now and then.

Some Stupidity: Yahoo Answers/Questions

Two bouts of stupidity for you, as I try to get a slightly more serious post out-of-the-way.

Topic: Yahoo Questions and Answers.

2 things.

Thing #1:

I noticed, every time I looked at an answer on this, I saw that there was a ‘Best Answer – ย Chosen by Asker’ on every answered question.

Who the hell is Asker?

I think it’s the capitals of Asker that made me think this was a person. I now know that it’s asker like the person who ASKED, rather than a name similar to an old classmate… I think his name was Askar? I can’t remember, but it was close enough to ‘asker’ that when I actually read and absorbed exactly what was being written there, I noticed that it was on EVERY answered question–or at least every question that had gone past it’s question due-date (when the asker sets for the question to be answered by in general)–and it didn’t make any sense as to why people were putting such weight into the top choice of this Asker figure…

I don’t know what made me clue in, but it was probably just one day I read it and actually understood it as it could also be.

So the mystery of who the hell Asker was and why they were so important was solved, and boy am I glad that I never ASKED someone about this oddity.

It’s fine admitting this now, as I now know my mistake, but I feel like the embarrassment of having to be informed of this…

And now the internet knows ๐Ÿ˜›

And as a bonus, HERE’s what I was recently Yahoo’ing to make me think of this. The milk expiration date is Feb 28, and it’s March 2nd, and while I know that the expiration date is only a BEST BEFORE date, Lexy has me paranoid of these things now.

Even after reading the Best Answer, I still did her test of pouring it into a cup first before risking cereal.

Lexy, this is not an attack, I just am weary of the possibility of off milk after finding a small carton of solid chocolate milk that my roommates had left in the fridge. (ink, read posts from bottom up to understand)

Okay, and Thing #2

This was a while ago, and in the timeframe of “I don’t care about the ‘real’ shows, I like cartoons ONLY–for the most part” sort of stage that I have moved from to embrace the “I like everything–for the most part” sort of stage I am in now.

I still watch a huge amount of anime online (can name a number of sites off the top of my head even), but I also look up episodes to ‘real’ shows…

So, when I went on an “I’m helpful and will answer questions on Yahoo Answers” spree when I was in I think grade 8 or maybe 9, I came across a question asking for where to find episodes of Dexter.

Dexter's Lab anyone?

I thought, hey, I wouldn’t want to watch that right now, but I know where they can look!

Found out later that Dexter is something different.

Very Different

To add to this, I found out late in Rangers, a program I took during the summer I was 17, that my answer made it onto 4chan. My dear friend S told me while laughing that she’d seen it posted there, and thought it was funny that she now knew it was from me…

Greeeeat…

And, I don’t know if this misunderstanding on my part bore this into the world, or perhaps someone else who was like “LOLZ Old Cartoon or New Show? MIXED” but the picture below makes me smile anyway.

 

And also worry that I started something that will bite me now that I’m fessing up to two Yahoo blunders.

So there are two things of embarrassment, now out to the internet, if anyone else has seen my ‘answer to the Dexter Query, please send me a link or something…

Bah, stupid younger me…

Always fun revisiting things like these ๐Ÿ˜›

Anyone else have any blunders?