Video Vendredi – Russel Howard Comedy

My Dad sends out an e-mail to the family and also to some friends every week. Often on fridays, sometimes on other days of the week, but they are all funny.

He sends out 5 or 6 pictures. They could be Rage comics, unfortunate pictures that you can’t help but laugh at, cartoons parodies, costumes people have used on their pets… They are always hilarious, and the message that goes with them are usually messages to the family about what’s for dinner, that he’ll be going to the grocery store, and since I’ve been in Ottawa rather than back home in Toronto, I’ve been killed by mentions of the delicious home made food that I’ll NOT be having.

One consistent message is always this though, and I hope today’s Video Vendredi helps this along.

“Cheer up!”

I know it’s long, but hilarious, and as a bonus to make sure you cheer up, here’s one from 2008.

Magnanimous 50¢

Went to one of the conveniently places Mac’s that’s a short walk from my res, feeling in need of a bag of chips and maybe an Arizona.

It’s late, but nice out, and I’m tempted to go on walking, past this macs and maybe onto the next one.

I don’t, and I’m glad  I did.

When looking for my Arizona, I moved back from the chip selection at my back so that this baby faced guy to get past me, and he says while walking towards and past me, as if continuing a conversation:

“I really like your sweater–”

Because He was looking at me I said Thank you, and he continued with

“Yeah, it looks like it’d be really warm, it is warm isn’t it? Thanks”

and continued walking.

I thought, okay, baby faced, and a rather high (if sort of scratchy) voice, probably younger than I thought. I was thinking MAYBE University, more likely High School. Very likely he’s high.

Now I was thinking that, well, it’s possible he’s in university, but it’s more likely he’s either in high school or middle school. Very likely high.

I was smiling at the compliment because, high or not, compliments are nice, and he looked cute.

I know I just finished saying he was most likely pretty young, but he had a face of someone you knew was going to be cute if you gave it a few more years.

Maybe his voice would sound nice after Puberty as well, I was sort of thinking, but he had some acne, so perhaps the voice issue was from smoking so much, or maybe he had a cold, or maybe he was just that high.

So I grabbed a bag of chips and two Arizona’s (one for later) and brought it to the counter, where the baby-faced, high voiced kid had finished buying whatever he had ought + orange juice (“Hey, where’s my orange juice? I can’t find it!” The cashier pushes the orange juice in bag towards him. “oh”) and I notice that he’s left behind two quarters.

The Cashier slides the change to the side but pauses when the kid speaks up.

“Oh, no, that’s for her…”

I felt like laughing in his face, because he sounded like he was being the nicest (and possibly flirtiest) guy out there.

Yeah, in a tone one would use for giving up a $10, he says:

“Oh, no, that’s for her…”

Baby faces, high voice, and I still don’t know if that’s a confirmation that he’s high, or that he’s really young to think that 50 cents is generous, or maybe he’s really high out of his mind, but I bought my chips and Arizona’s with a small smile and a non-verbal conversation with the cash register guy…

He means it’s for you, eh?

Yeah, I know, you keep it.

Sure? He’s being very generous…

Yeah, go ahead. I can go without his magnanimously given 50¢

Really.

Yeah, I’m sure I’ll survive.

🙂

😀

I’m still giggling about it, and part of me wants to meet that guy again… when he’s high or not, because it was really friggin funny XD

Especially since the parting glance between Cashier and I was a mutual

Look at him eh?

I know…

Yard Work Help

This weekend is a Working Weekend, where my family and I Work In The Backyard, and Clean The House as needed. We regularly try to minimalize any actual Cleaning in house unless Lexy puts on her Lex Luthor persona and encourages (read: forces) us.

Today was mainly working on cleaning along the side of our garage, where there was copious amounts of rotting, punky, nail-ridden planks of useless wood. This is a No, because as soon as we realized a couple of weeks back that Gwynn (our overly curious dog) has been chasing the squirrels there.

Even mostly empty, it's still so messy...

This is all the stuff (or at least a good portion) that we took from the side of the garage

There was a lot of stuff there, most of which we really didn’t want him getting into… There were just too many situations where we would have to bring dog into the vet for, such as him stepping on a rusty nail, him trying to eat the pressure treated wood (which is BAD for dogs, like poison and grapes), trip over one of the beams and break something, get trapped or squished when, after knocking into one of the taller piles/vertically leaning planks, everything falls on him, and possibly a couple of other things too.

We had had everything blocked off; using an ingenious wall made up from garbage cans and not-nasty planks, but figured the best solution would be to actually clean it…

Lexy used this for a lot of the planks... Gwynn was not inpressed

So we started hauling out all of the planks of wood to throw out, some of the thicker pieces requiring Dad to use an axe on the pieces, but otherwise we used power tools to cut the pieces into smaller sections.

It all needed to be able to fit into our Garbage cans after all.

We ended up not being able to get all of the pieces in there though, so we have to wait till next garbage day to get rid of ALL of it. That’s not too much fun, but we got a lot done.

One of the things that we found while pulling things from the side was a large orange tarp.

My family is a big believer in the usefulness of a tarp, so we spread it out to dry off for a bit, and quickly found out that a gigantic slug had been hiding out in its folds. Mom even made the noise that she usually reserves for earwigs when she found it, but that’s understandable… the Beastly Slug was bigger than her thumb, sooo…

Yeah. Understandable.

Now look at your thumb, and imagine it's a large slug. Go ahead, do it. Yes, eww.

What was not understandable was why I was the one who had to get rid of it. I mean, Finders Keepers and all that jazz right?

But no, it was me who had to roll it onto a leaf and put it in our compost bins…

Everyone else was happy (including the Slug Beast I bet, since we have a lot of good compost material in our bins, and that’s good slug food I bet), and I dealt with the slug.

Blegh.

So we spread out the Orange tarp, and I started to shake it out to loosen the dirt…

Dog helped.

And then ran away… and then helped again…

He seemed to really like playing with the tarp, but he kept on trying to chew on it, so that part wasn’t fun.

But, after the hose was turned on, I started spraying it down…

He also seemed to really like the hose, so that part was fun, and it was interesting seeing him slowly deflate as his hair got weighed down by water.

 Fun times with this, eh?

But hosing it down wasn’t going to do much, I have to admit… so Lexy helped out by bringing out a scrubby brush…

It was apparently a particularily ferocious looking scrubby brush, since Gwynn attacked it in our defense…

the entire thing was pretty hilarious, and it took up a good amount of time, so by that time Lexy suggested (reda: decided) that it would be a good time to start cleaning up inside.

We did a good general clean inside on the main floor, and then headed to the basement to get it looking like less of a war zone.

Our basement used to be an apartment, and up untill a little mor ethan a year ago, we had a tenant  who lived there. She was nice, and a bit of a shop-a-holic, and ended up giving up a LOT of her clothing to us. We never really had to go shopping…

Aah, those were the days…

Bou, since she’s moved out, we’ve been using it as a sort-of storage area, so even cleaning it up menat that there were some boxes along the walls, and things hung up around the room.

My primary job was to move all of my hockey stuff back into my hockey bag, since my parents had emptied it out to hold suits while they went to Florida for a week. Mom’s school participates in something called DECA, and regularily goes on trips. It’s a sort-of business club, and at these events they get prizes and the like, and Mom usually enlists Dad’s help in acting as a Judge/supervisor at these things.

They didn’t exactly ask if they could use my bag, but with the season being over, I figured that they were taking their own rishs with the suits that they were bringing up smelling of hockey equiptment, and got a good laugh at picturing my mom hauling around my hockey bag in front of her students.

But I still needed to clean out my hockey bag, and them removing everything from it gave me encouragement to get it over with already.

I had a couple of pairs of socks that were too small, and at least two jerseys that I wasn’t likely to use, as well as a number of tape wads that were just taking up space.

I narrowed it down to having four pairs of socks (I make them holy regularily, so spares are understandable), and three different coloured jerseys. The rest were going to be thrown in the garbage.

And it was–save one jersey.

Lexy suggested using one of my old jerseys and maybe stufing i with something, since Gwynn has always shown an interest in my equiptment, so I saved one for him. Perhaps we will make it into a large pillow or something… if anyone can think of anything else that could possibly be done by two amateur-ish crafters, feel free to mention.

But before we did that…

Yeah, put  yo paws in the ay-yer, a-a-yer, a-yer!

lol, ignore or accept my dorkishness, it’s still there.

Here are some more pictures inspired by my dorkishnes.

And he submerged his head, only to find that it was only dirty water, not beer, within the bucket. Alas...

We played for a bit before drying him off some more (minus the jersey)

 

He stands tall in his pride as a Hockey Supporter and Fan...

Lexy used her Boss charms to get him to consent to the Towel…
Quick explanation to Boss:
You know the dog owners who go overboard with the whole “Yes, look at mummy mupsy-wupsy! Oooooh, what a good girl/boy! Now give mummy kisses, etc, etc, etc…”?
 
Well, Lexy didn;t wnat to be one of those people…
 
Close quote: “I am not the dog’s mother, and will never be the dog’s mother. Gwynn’s relationship to me shouold be more like an employee to a bos… yes, I am the dog’s Boss. Bwahaha! Hear me roar!”
or something like that…
 

yes, Lexy can be entirely too cutsy with Dog, but still a powerful, almost Jedi force keeps Gwynn frrom fidgeting and attempting escape when she towels him... strange...

So we got a lot done this weekend, Lexy got the rest of the basement cleaned with my help, she had friends over to go to the bars for a belated birthday bash, the basement now clean enough for a few of them to stay the night, and oh!

Almost forgot to mention that I fixed up a small problem that we’ve been having with the mesh doors. Dog keeps running into the mesh doorways, and looking thoroughly disgruntled when he ouldn’t get past the invisible force-field, so I fixed it.

from left: star, swirl, X, flower... reflective and protective (TM) 😀

STICKERS! Yes, I cut out pictures from some shiny tape (not unlike duct tape), and put them on the screen door at the appropriate height for dog.  

I feel as though this would have been less of an issue had Dog not been very suspicious of his ability to get through doorways after his interactions with the screen door…
It’s not fun when You have to cajole and go outside yourself to get your pet to go outside to take a leak…
 
Yeah, not nearly as convenient as just letting him out…
 
So that was the weekend, and all of it’s productiveness!
 
Ciao~
 
~Doodled93~