Black Cat Analogy? For my own use…

I just found this:

Black Cat Analogy

It’s very clever, but I was thinking, what about for me?

When I was little we had two cats, one creme with orange tips to his ears and tail (Eric), and a sort of purplish grey cat with a black face, ears, tail, legs,feet…

Yeah. Now we have this guy.

Gwynn in Snow 2011

So I decided perhaps it would also make sense if I were to adjust this to a Fluffy Pale Dog Analogy…

So then.

To set the scene, you’re out with your fluffy pale dog, enjoying the snow as it falls, and you’re letting him romp around in the snow…

PHILOSOPHY is sort of like, while on this walk, your dog (Let’s call him Gwynn) bounds off into the surrounding wooded area, and you lose sight of him. You can hear him though, and try spotting him by following the sounds.

METAPHYSICS is like if, on your walk, Gwynn runs over to the other side of a hill and is out of sight, and you call for him because you can’t hear him anymore. Then, when you go to follow where you last saw him go (and you’re sure he isn’t there anymore, as you’ve already called his name in varying tones of excitement and command), there is movement from the corner of your eye, and you can feel low in your heart that what comes back isn’t going to be your fluffy dog, but a slicked down dog who has found something to roll in…

(That thing was dead and half melted despite the snow)

THEOLOGY is like losing sight of Gwynn, and calling for him, and you see movement, and out from the scraggly underbrush comes–! An entirely different dog.

What? That’s not Gwynn!

SCIENCE is like getting tired of calling for Gwynn, he’s obviously found something interesting to sniff and/or roll in, so you start running, treats in hand. Surprise, surprise, Gwynn comes, and is more likely to come back again, because he knows you’re packin’ that dried liver he loves so much.

Yeah. Just a bit of fun 🙂  Maybe I’ll add more pictures to this later.

Looked a bit like I had a Boner…

So, one thing that I’ve noticed bout when Lexy goes on Walks, is that she usually carries a bag with her. One to sling over her shoulder and hold onto a water botle, a fold-up dish, and the poop bags.

The other day when I went for a walk with Gwynn, I decided that it was hot, yes, but we were only going out for a half-hour for now, and another short walk later, so I decided to forgo grabbing a bag and just shove the bags in my pocket.

A few streets from my house, I looked down and noticed that the tube of bags I’d shoved into the pocket of my shorts was looking a bit odd.

A bit like I had a boner…

I’m sure no one thought that I, in my girly short shorts and floral shirt, was a man showing off my junk, but still, in the same way penis jokes have amused me when I was in middle school, I was still amused at the thought.

Makes me wonder if other people would have connected the bulge by my crotch was a roll of poop bags (lavender scented, even) and what else they could have thought it was.

Just thoughts.

Video Vendredi – Vlogbrothers (John Green)

I get tired of mentioning John or Hank Green from Vlogbrothers and getting a blank look…

Lexy, this video is something John Green calls Question Tuesday on his (and his brothers) vlog, and he is honestly hilarious.

Hope you enjoy, check out John Green’s books HERE (yes, he’s a published author, and his books are amazing)

Check out the Vlogbrother channel HERE

A Nerdfighter is someone who, instead of being made out of cells and organs and whatnot, is made out of pure Awesome. Nerdfighter is like Freedom Fighter, in that they fight for Nerds, and this was made up during the earlier stages of Vlogbrothers, and most people become Nerdfighters because they follow John and Hank Green.

The Yeti mentioned in the video above is John’s wife, nicknamed as such because she doesn’t want to be in the videos. Hanks wife, The Katherine

Also;

Toby Turner is Tobuscus and is also awesome, and also plays games on TobyGames. Links to each of his 3 channels (he gets paid to make videos)

‘ship’ is you like the idea of two characters together in a relationship.

Wholock = Doctor Who and Sherlock. Apparently ‘shipped’. Another example of ‘shipping’ would be Johnlock (John/Sherlock) for any Sherlock related fandom, because I think everyone believes that there’s a bromance happening there. Other examples include Iron Man/Capt. America, Kirk/Spock, Naruto/Sasuke, and the reason why I’m using male/male ‘ships’ is because any time I hear about someone shipping two characters together, it’s usually two guys.

Hope you enjoyed 🙂

INTERESTING FACT!: Hank Green, John Green’s brother, is not actually named Hank. He’s William. His family just decided to call him Hank instead of what’s on  his birth certificate. I think it’s funny 😀

Video Vendredi – The Music Box

Third Video Vendredi!

I’m going to have to retract what I said in the first, Lexy has Wordless Wednesdays, yes, but so do a number of people apparently.

I still like Video Vendredi though.

Perhaps I shall also do a Musical Monday, or some other alliteration to some other day of the week. Or month.

I don’t know…

Suggested to me by a friend, here is “The music Box”

Hope you enjoy 😀

Question for you: What genre of music would you want to have played to your actions?

Video Vendredi – Russel Howard Comedy

My Dad sends out an e-mail to the family and also to some friends every week. Often on fridays, sometimes on other days of the week, but they are all funny.

He sends out 5 or 6 pictures. They could be Rage comics, unfortunate pictures that you can’t help but laugh at, cartoons parodies, costumes people have used on their pets… They are always hilarious, and the message that goes with them are usually messages to the family about what’s for dinner, that he’ll be going to the grocery store, and since I’ve been in Ottawa rather than back home in Toronto, I’ve been killed by mentions of the delicious home made food that I’ll NOT be having.

One consistent message is always this though, and I hope today’s Video Vendredi helps this along.

“Cheer up!”

I know it’s long, but hilarious, and as a bonus to make sure you cheer up, here’s one from 2008.

Video Vendredi – Lost Your Reading

I’m not great at speaking french, and am better at understanding it than speaking it if that makes any sense, But Lexy has Wordless Wednesdays and now I’m having this 😛

Video Vendredi will have videos I think are amusing/amazing, have been suggested to me by friends, and occasionally will be very ‘what the hell?’ worthy.

Today, it is something that has been rated the best animated short 😀

Enjoy

Thoughts?

Magnanimous 50¢

Went to one of the conveniently places Mac’s that’s a short walk from my res, feeling in need of a bag of chips and maybe an Arizona.

It’s late, but nice out, and I’m tempted to go on walking, past this macs and maybe onto the next one.

I don’t, and I’m glad  I did.

When looking for my Arizona, I moved back from the chip selection at my back so that this baby faced guy to get past me, and he says while walking towards and past me, as if continuing a conversation:

“I really like your sweater–”

Because He was looking at me I said Thank you, and he continued with

“Yeah, it looks like it’d be really warm, it is warm isn’t it? Thanks”

and continued walking.

I thought, okay, baby faced, and a rather high (if sort of scratchy) voice, probably younger than I thought. I was thinking MAYBE University, more likely High School. Very likely he’s high.

Now I was thinking that, well, it’s possible he’s in university, but it’s more likely he’s either in high school or middle school. Very likely high.

I was smiling at the compliment because, high or not, compliments are nice, and he looked cute.

I know I just finished saying he was most likely pretty young, but he had a face of someone you knew was going to be cute if you gave it a few more years.

Maybe his voice would sound nice after Puberty as well, I was sort of thinking, but he had some acne, so perhaps the voice issue was from smoking so much, or maybe he had a cold, or maybe he was just that high.

So I grabbed a bag of chips and two Arizona’s (one for later) and brought it to the counter, where the baby-faced, high voiced kid had finished buying whatever he had ought + orange juice (“Hey, where’s my orange juice? I can’t find it!” The cashier pushes the orange juice in bag towards him. “oh”) and I notice that he’s left behind two quarters.

The Cashier slides the change to the side but pauses when the kid speaks up.

“Oh, no, that’s for her…”

I felt like laughing in his face, because he sounded like he was being the nicest (and possibly flirtiest) guy out there.

Yeah, in a tone one would use for giving up a $10, he says:

“Oh, no, that’s for her…”

Baby faces, high voice, and I still don’t know if that’s a confirmation that he’s high, or that he’s really young to think that 50 cents is generous, or maybe he’s really high out of his mind, but I bought my chips and Arizona’s with a small smile and a non-verbal conversation with the cash register guy…

He means it’s for you, eh?

Yeah, I know, you keep it.

Sure? He’s being very generous…

Yeah, go ahead. I can go without his magnanimously given 50¢

Really.

Yeah, I’m sure I’ll survive.

🙂

😀

I’m still giggling about it, and part of me wants to meet that guy again… when he’s high or not, because it was really friggin funny XD

Especially since the parting glance between Cashier and I was a mutual

Look at him eh?

I know…

Uh, 13 Doodle, We have a Code Brown in Balsam

My job this past summer was working as a Maintenance Worker at Grundy Lake.

I wasn’t the person who would direct you to your site.

I wasn’t the person who helped you change sites and sold you firewood.

I wasn’t the person who put on the nature shows, telling you about bears, and bugs, and what’s what about nature.

I didn’t guide you through any of the free trails Grundy has to offer, pointing out interesting things along the way.

I wasn’t the person who told you to quiet down from partying at midnight.

I wasn’t the person who told you you have to leave your site at 2, and do you realize it’s 2:30?

I wasn’t the person who you called to deal with your noisy neighbours, who also happened to be cutting branches from the forest for their fire.

I wasn’t any of these people, but I was the person who made sure you would want to come back.

I was the person who kept the main attraction clean.

Yes, I do mean that I made sure that branches weren’t overgrowing the roads and the sites.

Yes, I do mean that I mowed grass and trimmed the trails.

Yes, I do mean that I clipped back those prickly bushes from by the parking lots, and around your site.

But when I say that I keep the main attraction clean, I do not mean nature.

I mean the toilets.

You might say I deal with the real ‘business’ of maintaining the Park.

You may laugh, scoff at the idea that the toilets are the main attraction, but would you be so willing to go camping if the only option while camping with a little more than 100 other campers (in your AREA) was a couple of thunder boxes?

This is a hole, dug approx. 6 feet into the ground, with a box with a hole in it set on top. Bring your own toilet paper, and a flashlight if it's dark.

Grundy is known for it’s privacy ratings, but we can’t exactly make this private… every once in a while we have to go and fill in the hole, dig another one a little ways off, and put the box back on top. Putting another box, or some other kind of privacy thing around it wouldn’t work.

Yes, While the back-country sites have thunderboxes, their excuse is that they are for the people who want to go roughing it. That is for the people who want to canoe across the lake with their suff, and set up tents where they can find flat places. I think there are about 4 or 5 backcountry sites in Grundy… We don’ have to go there and clip it back, we leave that to the Rangers close to the area (Ontario Parks Rangers, a summer job for people who are turning 17 the year they sign up for it, free room and board and food, minimum wage.)

For everyone else, there are the outhouses.

We clean the outhouses.

We clean them every day.

We sweep them out, get rid of webs, wipe down the seats (with cleaning spray and a rag) to each and every set of outhouses.

There are 36 sets, I believe, in Grundy.

3 of those sets are set up as one side of one outhouse is mens, and the other is women’s.

The rest have two outhouses at each spot, which means that there are 66 individual outhouses that two Maintenance workers clean.

Every day.

 

This is what one Grundy Lake outhouse looks like. Right next to it, another would be set up, but for girls. Singles would be one of these buildings, with one gender for each door.

We also paint these when the paint starts getting cracked… I think I painted about 6 sets of outhouses this past summer. My coworkers complained about t, but I liked painting them. It used up time, and I like painting in general.

The inside looks like this... But this summer we painted the insides cream rather than green.

The toilets at Grundy actually flush as well, which was nice until I realized that it means that It can also get clogged.

Ladies flushing pads, and moms (and dads too) flush diapers… Why YES it’s the perfect size to go down that hole, now lets flush it… oh, right, that adds water and makes it expand! Oh gosh, it’s clogged!

What a surprise.

Really.

Anyway, while working, we drive around in the MNR trucks, and when we get radio calls (all students were 13 _your name_, and if you were calling someone, lets say their code name was 3-4, you would say “3-4 read 13 _your name_” and end with “13 clear”. Calls for you from this person would be “13_your name_ read 3-4” ), and one of the most common were for Code Browns.

Can you guess what it is?

Well, it’s when someone misses in a big way.

I figure that some of these people are holding themselves up while taking a dump, otherwise how did they get it all over the seat? On the floor? On the walls? (methinks this last one is some REALLY upset stomach)

I’m certain some kids think it’s funny to poop in awkward places, because I found a present behind one of the toilets once.

Yeah. my pictures look kind of unreal, and not really appropriate… also, for the majority, I haven’t had my camera, and even though I’ve been blogging for  while now, I still haven’t gotten to the point here I can see poop n the floor and splattered on the walls and think “Hey, I should get a picture of that.”

For the really bad ones we use a pressure washer (water tank in back of truck), but otherwise use a ‘bunny tail’.

This is a Bunny tail. No rabbits were harmed for the use of this.

Yeah. Bunny Tail is how I was introduced to it.

It’s gross, and there’s a lot of groaning about it, but we do it.

There are risks.

The nauseating smell, the campers who complain in he first place, the risk of a backwash of ‘shit-mist’ from the pressure-washer (hide behind door is the preferred method), along with the feeling of “Oh, nooooooo!” when the pressure washer runs out of gas and you have to leave the Scene of the Crime to get more….

But we do it.

Because we are the Maintenance workers.

We wear our coveralls with pride.

We clomp in our Steel-toed boots knowing that we’ve done a job-well-done.

While in our trucks, we still wave to campers, even knowing that there’s a certain percentage of assholes out there among you who we will have to deal with, them and their shit, and are happy when people wave back.

Yes, we wonder if the reason you smiled so widely is because you know we have to go clean up the smear you left behind, or if perhaps its because you’re happy that that Code Red (only on the female side, guess what it is) will soon be cleaned up, but we wave and smile anyway. (P.S. we are actually required to wave in the beginning, but after a week or so you get used to it and do it intentionally)

No, we are not Gate workers, we are not Naturalists, we are not Park Wardens.

We are Maintenance workers.

We clean up your shit.